I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
