Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
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