You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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