he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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