your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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