im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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