thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
