I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
