yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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