I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
