Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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