I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
