so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
A bitchslap is in order.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
