You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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