Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
