I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
