i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
