South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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