yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
