WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
