hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
