What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
