....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize