i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
