apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
