I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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