i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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