i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
