I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
