He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
