Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
