kristin has been a bad kristin
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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