the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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