i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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