Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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