we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
