So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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