In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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