Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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