But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
