She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
did i walk over a car last night?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Randomize
