ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
i think my cat just said my name.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
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