So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
