just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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