Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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