she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
