I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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