what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
