You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He felt like a one man threesome
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
