2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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